I had a friend I met in the summer of 1980. He was two grades behind me in high school in Muskegon and was a classmate of my sister. I had just finished my second year of college. Jerry and I became fast friends. Later, he married and I married with both of us now living in the Grand Rapids area.

His marriage was rocky from the start. Over the course of time having three children and in-laws that thoroughly disliked him, they lost their apartment and had to move into a three bedroom mobile home with his in-laws.

To be fair to his wife, Jerry liked to play mind games. He was also not very good in the home, preferring to come home from work, put his feet up and watch TV while his also-working wife had to take care of the kids and cook dinner. Once he complained about the food when living with his, complaining they always have potatoes. This showed how clueless he was about groceries and cooking. Potatoes are cheap, I told him.

Every so often he would call me and I would hear the in-laws screaming and yelling at him in the background and he'd ask if he could come stay the night. My wife and I lived in a small two bedroom house with our son so Jerry had to sleep on the sofa. But then came on of those times he came over and instead of one night or two his stay became a week with no end in sight. It was disrupting our household. My wife couldn't go about her normal routines.

Finally, after more than a week, I asked to meet them at a burger joint near their home. I told them I was happy to help out but that this extended stay wasn't good for MY family. When we left the restaurant it was the last time I would see him for ten years! He actually beat me back home got his stuff and left.

We came across each other over the next few years periodically as he went on to a second then third marriage. But we never became friends again.